Sometimes I fear that I am becoming a monster. No, literally.
My skin turns green, my snout grows at a stupendous rate,
My eyes bug out and my toes transform to talons,
My tummy bulges, the fire in my breath becomes so unbearable that I just have to
Seriously. Sometimes I think I ought to see the doctor.
I had an idea for a silly poem today.
And then I thought,
So many serious things!
And with all due respect America, I would rather discuss puppies.
My dog does not judge me for my faults.
No, she knows nothing of my past present or future.
My dog does not hate me for my foolish mistakes
My dog will always offer a comforting lick on the nose and nip at the fingers
My dog merely accepts the inevitable...
We're only here for a little while, so we might as well eat the cat's food.
A Secret Desire
I hope that one day I wake up to be an elephant
Peaceful, powerful, and honest
I'll gather around my ancestor's bones
(elephants do that you know)
and I will think about all the good times we had at our favorite watering hole
I want to be able to eat as much as I want
The fatter I am, the happier
I hope that one day I wake up to find that size doesn't matter on any account
My trunk is a trunk and as long as it's long enough to scratch my own back
One day, I hope I wake to the sound of giraffes making whatever noise they make
Because as an elephant, I imagine I'll be in on this secret
I suppose I wouldn't care
Elephants are pretty easy going when it comes to solving mysteries
God or whatever doesn't really matter
I'll have lovely African trees to eat from
And nice mud to roll around in when I need to cool off